September 2004 Archives

I shit myself this morning

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Bush / Kerry Election 2004

I put that there because I thought it was funny and may in fact piss a lot of people off. I'm tired of people trying to convince me to vote for one or the other and sending me shit I don't care about. I thought this forwarded email I got was pretty funny, so I am going to let you read it.

College is still incredibly hard for me to handle. Learning a new chapter everytime I have class is too much for me to take in. Studying 5 chapters for each class then having tests in them is too hard. I thought my Rhetorical Communications test was at 2:30pm, but was at 1:30. So I get to make that up in December when I will be crammed with mad finals. I got a 70% on my Planet Earth Geology exam and was happy with a C. Then I find out he curves it and the top 10% get A's, the bottom 10% gets F's. Everyone I talked to did better than me. I had a Geology lab today and had to classify rocks by looking at them. It was hard, I'm sure I screwed that one up, too. I have a business test at 4pm, but instead of studying 3,000 PowerPoint slides, I am posting on my website. I dropped my College Algebra class because my teacher was a pure bread faggot who likes to not teach and make you feel like a complete retard. I'll pick up a new math class with a real teacher next semester.

College is hard. But I have a really cute RA so everything is OK.

What the hell is this kid doing? That's more homo than me pissing my name on a wall.

So this morning I woke up an hour early to study for my test at 9:30am. At about 9:10am, I feel a pretty big shit working up in my stomach. My roommate was in the shower and I was sitting on my computer chair. Then it hit me bad. I got up to go to the bathroom to poop while my roommate was showering, but I didn't make it. The "Hold It In" muscle got too pressured and I unleashed in my boxers. I got up to take my boxers off and clean up and it started dripping down my leg. As I was naked and cleaning myself until I could get in the shower my roommate walks out and I cover up in the towel.

ME: Dude, I just shit.
HIM: Yeah, I smelled it in the bathroom.
ME: *whipes up shit that dripped on the floor with a sock and runs into the bathroom*

I took a quit clean off shower and then headed to my exam. As I was taking the test, I could feel wet poo slowly coming out of my butt. I didn't go to my next class because I had to shower, do laundry, and clean the room of poo smell. I thought I liked sharing a bathroom with 3 other guys, but now I am thinking I like community bathrooms with more than one toilet.

College is shitty. But again, I have a really cute RA so everything is OK.

I don't feel like typing out a story for these next pictures. Just remember kids, don't drink and play with things that can make your hair go away.

1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9

I am leaving for Ocean City, Maryland tonight. B Watson has a condo down there and they are going to the Nascar race in Dover. I'll take the camera and be back Sunday. But you know I won't post again for like 3 decades. Sluts.

Well, I must go attempt to study for my 4 chapter business exam then pack my shit.

Well hello strangers

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WVU RankI'll start off this post with that little statistic to the left. I saw that and took a screen shot of it before I even started attending West Virginia University for a post that I obviously never did. I don't even remember when I arrived here, but I stayed at my friends house on Grant Street for a few days. Grant Street on weekends has a party at every house. I wasn't ready for this, but bought a keg cup and drank my ass off. Sorry mom, I only don't drink on Tuesday's.

A lot of kids from my high school go here. I like that and I also don't. I can be comfortable at a party knowing people, but that prevents me from meeting anyone new. I already knew this kid. Sadly I know these guys, too. But I got to meet these guys. I talked to them for a while because they were from China. They claimed they were in their 30's and came here to study something I don't remember. I told them communism works in theory but I have a better chance of shitting normal then communism does working. I think they got pissed. They also said they were going to take their degrees and go back to China. They look kind of homosexual when I look back on the picture. But then again, so do I.

I had so much stuff to post before I left for college, but never got around to it. I went to a Pirates game and had sweet seats. Got an expensive new phone with Windows Mobile on it, but it doesn't work at school. Cleaned my room and threw everything away that I saved because I realized I will never live at home like I used to. Kind of depressing for 36.5345 seconds.

OK, now back to my life at college. My boy McNeil, who you will get to know better in just a few minutes, had a keg on the night of Fall Fest which featured the music of Fuel, Kanye West, Trapt, and Particle. The picture sucks I took, because my camera flash is weak, and I may have been intoxicated.

So I'm at a small get together and two of the owners of the house decide to try and get any freshman around to jump off of their roof. I am not stupid, so I went outside and had my camera ready. Two kids jumped, one was ok and everyone had a good time. Then we realized the other kid broke one leg and sprained his other ankle. I failed to mention they were raising to five roof jumps. Neither got to their goal. I jumped off a week later and broke a pubic hair.

Pictures are great. I don't remember either of these.

Now on to the first football game. It was crazy. I love how they designate a place in a parking lot, "The Pit", for all student to drink and eat free hotdogs. Here are pictures from the game I don't feel like typing out sentences for: 1 - 2 - 3.

I also have compiled a video of Mr. McNeil and the football game, then a wonderful music video. If for some reason you get no video but audio, just listen to the last minute. VIDEO REMOVED

I have shit to do. Absolutly nothing. College made me lazier, and makes me shit more liquid than I piss. Goodbye.