Holy shit eating crapface that is buttcornalicious.

Made my fourth appearance to Charleston, WV for the Division II WVIAC basketball tournament. The girls lost before I even got there and the men got beat in their 2nd game.

One thing that upset us was the fact that they didn't sell beer at the civic center due to WVIAC voting against it or something incredibly un-righteous, dude. We derived a simple solution to the problem at hand: buy a soda/pop/buttcorn, drink it, and make sure you sneak in enough drinks for you and friends. Optionally, you can bring a trash bag, if you got love for the janitorial staff.

We attempted another beeramid. It was very promising and I'd say we went through 10 cases of Nastty Light but people were in and out and didn't always bring their cans back. My man Reid contributed a lot when he wasn't passed out.

The beeramid never made it and we cleaned it up because it smelled like your buttcorn infested ass.

Hey Chris, where did you get that awesome wave cap?

B spent a lot of his time on the floor, grabbing his bloodied Peter Johnson, and clogging the toilet as he does at every hotel I have ever stayed at with him.

Chris passed out a lot, a little too much so we had to take some action.

VIDEO: Hey Chris, it's time to wake up you little slut (1.29MB)

On Saturday night Wells Fargo had rented out the Embassy Suites boardrooms and shit for a gathering of drinking and dancing. One of the more drunken superiors in the company let me and B walk in with him to score some good drinks. We got kicked out a couple minutes later, the second time we got in I hit the dance floor with a Heineken and sick moves, got kicked out again and banned from the drink station. The third time I started dancing in front of the door and an older lady grabbed me and we pimped on the dance floor like no other. At one point, it was just me and her, and everyone else circled around us like in the movies. Afterwards my legs were complete jello but it was well worth it. Those 3 pictures were taken by local paparazzi that I found on TMZ.com the next morning.

A special thanks to Freckles Graphics of WV for their generous as shit contribution to ToddMorrison.com

VIDEO: Fire jumper who I never paid $10 (903KB)

Goodbye, see you soon.

The picture to the left pretty much sums of what I have been up to - started my second to last semester of college, got an internship at the global operations center for a law firm making $10 an hour while earning 3 credits for school, and still working at Riesbeck's bagging up those groceries on Sundays. Speaking of school, here's my Fall 2007 grades. 3.33, baby!

I have some really bad news: Buttcorn has been discontinued due to it causing Pin Worms. In the small print on the back of the can there was a disclaimer talking about possible side-effects, so no one involved in manufacturing the marvelous product can be held liable. Regretfully, I got a severe case of it and had to find treatment. The doctors just laughed at me when I told them my itchy anus and diarrhea were caused by buttcorn pinwormization - so I was forced to find alternate pinworm removing options. It was thick and tasty, kinda like buttcorn. I sure did lick that badboy clean.

I always have the problem of not wanting to type and you never read so here's my usual solution: my pretty sweet cubicle at my internship, basement computing, B's new friend, B's snot and/or puke due to buttcorn overdosage, B and I after we blew some place up?, the coolest Christmas tree in town, Dominos is looking for dome - apply within, my fast downloading, ghetto stand SNES playage, black McGraw, I guess I was wasted, Laura's wonderland, some good pizza, meatspin world record holder, passed out neck pain, homecoming, retard in the back, first anniversary, mike chugging with added celebration, piss-writing, sharkey hurt my gator...

A few years ago I bought a $40 five pound bag of potassium nitrate online for use in making smoke bombs and to help out local terrorists. You mix sugar with it and heat it until it melts. When it ignites it produces smoke. I did it once and the preparing fumes made me grow hair on my ass instantly so I never did it again. Mike and I did it again with an even better outcome. I told Mike to turn the heat up a little to speed up the melting process and long butt hair growth. A minute or two later and it all went up in flames. It burnt everything around - Including Mike and his back.

Went to Oglebayfest/Octoberfest already wasted and took two pictures. New Years wasn't too bad. I got wasted and took one picture. I attended an away football game at Shepherd and got a good buzz on at the hotel bar with good people.

Went to a Penguins hockey game with B, then played sucked at hockey with B and others on the open ice.

Staley has an awesome apartment in Pittsburgh and I plan on frequenting it more and partying once it warms up a bit.

Dear suitemate, remove your washclothes every once and a while please.

Dear roommate, would it hurt you that much to take out the trash sometimes? I know it's none of my business but when you have your girlfriend over could you air out the pussy dick and ass smell, and maybe put the birth control in a drawer?

That's it. I am going to attempt to rethink my posting procedure to post more than once every five months and actually have something to say. I also revamped the site to better please myself and you since buttcorn is no longer an answer to everything.

You can register as a commentor with my new updated system. Better register your name fast before someone takes it! You can comment anonymously, but it requires a valid email which isn't much help in keeping spammers out. I may require all comments to be by a registered person if I get spammed a lot.

Went to Cedar Point for the first time a few weeks ago. Definitely a sweet roller coaster experience with some pretty sick rides. I went with Courtney, Matt and Becky. None of us being rich, I found the cheapest priced motel close to the park where we would spend two glorious nights. The Mecca Motel Resort & Dream Land. Fully equipped with an air conditioning, bathroom mirrors with possible hidden wonders, bed sheets with no elastic-band-thingy that holds the sheet to the mattress, continental breakfast, ultra-secure door locks with numerous dead bolts and chains, the greatest miniature golf that we never got to play, a swimming pool with excessive crud in it that we didn't pay extra for because we are rebels when we chug buttcorn too fast, small person friendly shower, an awesome view of the course, it said free HBO but all I could find was fuzzy Regis and Kelly. We learned that you get what you pay for except when it comes to buttcorn. Good thing we came prepaired and had a bible to protect us. I made a little brochure for the Mecca Motel but forgot to mention the train tracks 100 yards away where trains enjoy passing and tooting every 10-15 minutes.

I know it says no cameras while on the rides but since I am a gangster I got a few good action shots. You're welcome.

So what else have I done in three months? Oh yeah, I started cutting beats on TV with my girl Laura. Ate deliciously prepared filet mignon with Chef J. Took a picture of food I snuck out of a buffet because I am all about take home buffet action and documenting it on my website. Got outed in a facebok detail request. Was in my brothers wedding and got the wrong size shoes. Got a carload of fireworks from my awesome girlfriend and put on a good show at my stepdads farm. Bought a book online and it was a covered up international version but identical and half the price. Grilled my first rack of ribs. Saw a guy go from wasted to drooling sleep. Stepped in a 2 foot deep puddle at work and wore some modified bag socks. Left my brother and friends at his bachelar party Pirates game and sat with Mike McNeil in his rich kid seats. Went to Kentucky with my boy B for a West Liberty football game against Kentucky Wesleyan.

It seemed like every customer at work was on a Rachel Ray kick and buying everything she was making. I didn't know who she was and could have cared less... until my mom got on the same kick. They were good, though. And she looks pretty good, too. I was so impressed with her cooking I bought her Too Cool For School Mixtape to give to my kids when I have them years down the road. That was my intention even though she liked shoving things in her mouth I still found her suitable for my kids to listen to her mix tape until I found out she was a soap slut. But I still have respect for someone who can please everyone anally and make money doing it. And it was something to talk about to make this post look big and sexy.

Took 18 hours last semester and got my best ever 3.33 GPA. Taking 18 hours again this semester but getting a 3.0+ GPA again looks like it is going to be a little more difficult. Philosophy is stupid. So is being taught read PowerPoint slides word for word that the book publisher makes - THAT ISN'T TEACHING. If that is the new definition of teaching then I now know why teachers don't get paid enough and I don't feel bad. Five of my six classes are PowerPoint read.

That's all I got. Again, sorry I suck.

P.S.

Dad Morrison, could you send me a few grand in backpay child support? I need braces I am tired of smiling with my mouth closed as you can tell by every picture I have ever had taken since I was six. Thanks. I would myself but somebody has to pay for college with their summer job earnings and that isn't mom. Missed you at the wedding.

Since we last chatted... or actually, since I last typed and you didn't read and just clicked random picture links I attended two Pittsburgh Pirates Games. Both games the Bucs won and had a scheduled fireworks display after the game. First game I went with these guys, ate some enjoyable wings with my boy, saw McNeil and Meagan, and chilled in McNeils seats. Here's a couple shots of the field from the first game. Here are eight pictures of the fireworks from PNC Park, yeah that is right I am showing you eight pictures of PNC Park fireworks night. PNC Park Fireworks display baseball pirates. Yeah, I did that for search engine purposes I think. Oh yeah, Crosby sucked me but I was the only one able to take the pic and it didn't work out very well.

In the same week I got lucky twice. First, I got a majority of pink Starbursts in three two piece packs. Second, I finally got my first car five years late. 1998 Plymouth Breeze eggshell white and sexy. She never smiles but kinda looks like a ninja turtle from the front. Since these pictures I got a CD player from my girlfriend and it is sweet. I got the car from an old guy who couldn't legally drive anymore for $2,200. It had 82,000 miles on it and in great condition just needed a new battery which requires you to take the front left tire off and put into bumper. Advance Auto Parts would't do it and I hate them for it.

Thanks to Jay Z I am now the proud owner the Internet.

My birthday was alright this year - but it seems I don't get any money anymore. Mom and stepdad gave me $50, Grandparents gave me $20 check that I lost, Great Aunt gave me $21 - In a pretty cool way, with Gearge W. Bush's face on the dollar. The first thing I would do if I became president would be to put my face on money. Then I got the CD player from my beautiful girlfriend. I feel like I used to get more cash and/or cards. No biggie, since I HAVE FACEBOOOOOOK!!!! My facebook user birthday 5-9er delto rating has gone up since last year woooo!!!

There's nothing worse than stepping in a huge puddle in some new fresh whities and taking a picture of it to show your website readers. Those poor little shoelaces. I take that back, this might be worse. This was fun. On the fun subject - projecting computer onto projector is pretty tight, too.

Hey little ones of buttcorn, make sure when you eat a steak that it is really big, OK?

My new woot off checker in the late hours when I have class at 8am.

I was able to get enough free time and sponsors to have my first ever Buttcorn Taste Tester Party. People need to see how spectacular this shit really is. I went around the party and got a few pictures of how people were reacting to the Buttcorn drinks. These guys were getting out of hand but relaxed after a few more cups. These guys sucked and I made them leave. This lady wasn't too sure on trying the new Buttcorn Mammoth Edition XL. This girl was screaming some crazy stuff but it made more men drink I wonder why? These girls made for a good ad. And of all people I wasn't expecting my bartenders to start fighting.

OK, sluto-o-beans, it's time for me to go and post again in six months but make it only look like one.

I don't remember specific dates of each happening so shut up and just click the links without reading like you always do, looking for buttcorn sluts.

We went to a pretty cool bar in Little Haiti owned by a very nice Cuban man. Jay got hammered and tried to rob this one dude but they just danced instead.

The first or maybe second day we went to South Beach this guy playing the guitar came over to us - well, to Lyndi's tits. He said he was a song writer and that he was going to sing a song about Lyndi. Here it is: Gary James Noland - Lyndi (2:16 - 2.08MB). We were drinking Pabst Blue Ribbon that day and he refers to it as "Blue Ribbon Beer" in the song in case you care what he says when we start laughing, slut. Check out his website here.

Here are some pictures from South Beach:

1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12

I hated having to walk far to go piss - so I would just piss in the sand and Steve would lick it.

Lyndi got tired of us so the last three days we stayed with her friend Amanda in her dorm at Barry University. Amanda was never there and the three of us got her place pretty much to ourselves. And what do you do when you get a room that isn't yours to yourself? Jump on the bed with shoes on, jump some more, make a fort and top it off with undies, then leave a note that makes little sense except for that New Jersey sucks. FYI Amanda is from New Jersey, and New Jersey still sucks, but Amanda doesn't suck, she was very nice and we appreciated her room. Thanks, Amanda.

One night we decided to check out the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino because there is table gambling. I don't care much for gambling but Jay and Steve played some Texas Holdem. Jay lost his money, and Steve played until 4-5am and broke even. I masturbated on random things for 6 hours and ended up winning $70 in the slots - the same shit we have three minutes from my house in Wheeling, WV. Steve stumble pissed a lot afterwards.

I wanted to stop and get my taxes done but I couldn't decide which to go to.

Miami was sweet, but would have been much better if I was 21 or guys at the door would accept 8 year old expired ID's from California of a kid who was 15 when it was taken. But I will be 21 on May 16, 2007 - a little over a month away, kiddies. Thanks Lyndi for your place and presence, and Jay for the sweet idea. Otherwise I would have masturbated on my movie theatre all week. Is it spelled theatre or theater, or are they both correct? No one will tell me, no one will get anymore buttcorn.

As I mentioned in my last post, I went to the WVIAC Division II basketball tournaments in Charleston, WV. Men and Women's team both lost but the beer flowed once again this year and B inserted into the best damn pizza box, ever.

I really didn't take that many pictures while down there, but her they are:

B and Fahey jamming the piano - Buttcorn now sponsors Justin Edwards! - Handicap shower - More handicap shower in case you've never seen one - I hadn't - Natty - Pez bed - Pez bed 2 - Unofficial West Liberty Mascot

West Virginia won the NIT Tournament. Pretty funny they didn't even spell Virginia right - they spelled it "Virgina". What I found to be really funny is that the picture with Governor Manchin has the "I" in it. It was on the wvu.edu website. The government must have good Photoshopping employee's. Check it out here.

I took a sweet online survey for West Liberty because they said I get a special treat afterwards. Last I checked there is no such place as Cafe A La Cart at West Liberty State College. But oh, I do see there is one at the University of Pittsburgh. I'd drive over there but my 3 days is up to redeem. DAMNIT!!! No free pop for my services is going to drive me to smoke!

Hey Courtney, you look pretty cute here.

My dorm projection is pretty sweet. Foreigners type good english, Mike Young, Dump fishing in the cold ass water, moon-plane, snacking, Penguins game was fun, I <3 MacGyver.

My addiction to Woot.com is getting worse. I need help and to go to sleep before 1:00AM - but I can't that is WOOT TIME BABY!!! On April 1st the Bag O' Crap was offered for the price of $1,000,001.00 with the regular price of $5.00 for shipping. A coupon code "please" was discovered in the product image and utilized by Woot users to receive a $1,000,000 discount on the BOC, thus reducing the price to the standard one dollar. Too bad I didn't know that the 1st time and it was too late the 2nd time.

Well, that only took over 3 hours to type. Time to reward myself with some new buttcorn pudding packets.

Man, I wasted three years of my life going to a real college. If only I got this email my senior year of high school... A work/life experience degree in just two weeks with NO STUDYING!!! I'd be making millions right now instead of drinking buttcorn with my girlfriend and telling you about it! Hey princess, I bought you a case of buttcorn for the weekend. *Online Kiss*

I'm too scared to call that number, they might trick me into something I'd regret, like chugging buttcorn, dude. Or I am just lazy and one of you should call, record it, and send it to me. Or you can just read this and shut up and read this, too, while I call you a stupid slutface. You're still reading and I am still watching Chris stick his finger into your butt looking for some cornage. You have a prettybutt, though. Grade A+ RBC that is.

You probably think I am lying or believe me completely... but I have nothing better to talk about besides buttcorn.

I try a lot to talk about other things like where I am sending my FAFSA but I just delete them and put up new Recycled buttcorn ads. Oh that is kinda cute with a hint of sexy... WHAT?! buttcorn, ButtCorn, and new BUTTCORN chewables!!!!

I'm going to Charleston, WV for the WVIAC Division II basketball tournaments tomorrow until Sunday. I will be sure to chug buttcorn and take numerous pictures of it.

I will get to that picture you see on the left in a little bit; that is from the end of the journey NP Laura and I partook in. If you still read my shit, then you know about the marijuana field found close by us North Park dwellers. If you don't remember and care, I talked about it in this post somewhere in the middle. Laura and I woke up before 3PM for this journey and that shows we... The ToddMorrison.com I-Team Investigations decided to check out where we believed the totally illegal plants were growing. I took a bunch of pictures of nothing to seem important and feel apart of my I-Team Investigations team. This is the first time they let me tag along on an ultra-mission. But I shit a grenade in my pants and had to whipe with a stick and they made me go home and sit on my computer and wait. Laura stepped in a puddle that triggered a stick pooper shooter 350z arrow.

"It was only 6:23PM and getting darker as the ToddMorrison.com I-Team Investigators stumbled onto what everyone is calling the biggest crop of dirty grass ever supplied in the history of the mean streets of Wheeling, West Virginia. The pictures do not show much but no one really cares about some loose hay covering up fresh dirt. We couldn't get a direct quote from owner Todd Morrison but it sure did smell like shitnades in the area."

- Peter Thampton - MSNBCCC News Correspondent

I got my college grades. I'm now a junior and I passed College Algebra. Score. Dank pizza smells so much better when it's free and eaten in my movie theatre.

I went to the bank today. I grabbed my usual small sucker while the lady did her thing with my paycheck/christmas check. I noticed they were giving away keychains and said that out loud but in different words. The lady said yes, they are bottle openers. I put it in my pocket and forgot about it. When I got home I got online to peep my money increase. There was a double deposit and I mouth shat. After she corrected her error I was reminded of my new sweet bank quality bottle opener. I don't know what kind of bottle opener it is and I tested it on a close by Budweiser Select bottle. Yeah I know those twist off but if you want to be a tough guy you can bite the top off and eat shit. It didn't pry the bottle cap nor did it twist it off with its ultra bank awesome plastic teeth. If I had a bank, I'd give out tools that actually work for the common folk that don't buy bottles that require tools to enjoy.

Let's go Mountaineer's. WVU Football ended sexily with a comeback win in the Gator Bowl. Here are a few pictures from the game against USF that ended in a 19-24 loss.

This is somewhat old but I am ending my post with it:

LiL Str 0 ng (3:59:08 PM): so I was in University 101 last week and this guy, i dont remember this name, but anyways he came in about getting introuble for lighting a part of a dumpster on fire blah blah blah and he started talking about you and your website and out of no where i was like "i went to prom with him" and everyone looked at me and i felt really dumb!
T odd M 161 (3:59:24 PM): hahah
T odd M 161 (3:59:31 PM): you became a celebrity
LiL Str 0 ng (3:59:37 PM): duh!
LiL Str 0 ng (3:59:47 PM): haha
T odd M 161 (3:59:52 PM): this guy came into class to talk?
T odd M 161 (3:59:56 PM): and referenced me
LiL Str 0 ng (3:59:57 PM): yeah
LiL Str 0 ng (3:59:59 PM): yeah
T odd M 161 (3:59:59 PM): bahahha
T odd M 161 (4:00:10 PM): i hate west liberty
T odd M 161 (4:00:20 PM): it was so much easier to be awesome at wvu
LiL Str 0 ng (4:00:26 PM): about ur site and how you had pictures of people burning shit and how they took your computer and blah blah
T odd M 161 (4:00:34 PM): they took my computer?
LiL Str 0 ng (4:00:41 PM): the cops or the school did
T odd M 161 (4:00:45 PM): no they didn't
LiL Str 0 ng (4:00:55 PM): oh well that is what he said
T odd M 161 (4:00:55 PM): that's tight
T odd M 161 (4:01:04 PM): this is going on my website

See you next time and enjoy your complementary stink butt supreme burrito with cream chunks. If you don't think those taste very good you can always have hot bitches say your sexy on myspace.

I haven't posted because:

1.) I got a new laptop from woot.com and have been slowingly not typing real words on my website AKA just playing Scarface - The World is Yours, NHL 07, NBA Live 07, FIFA 07, Madden 07, and Counter-Strike: Source on the 10 pound laptop equipped with an XBOX 360 controller. Here are some pictures of my old and new laptop because I know you are so curious, slutface. Did I mention that I am addicted to woot.com? Add 5 more boxes to this picture since it was taken a month ago.

2.) Recently met a cute girl with soft lips that can't burp and doesn't like buttcorn but she's still pretty damn sweet. Thousands of nudie pictures of us are now in the ToddMorrison.com Uncensored section. Ofcourse, it is going to cost you $25 a month for membership to that section.

3.) WVU lost to Louisville but hopefully basketball season will create riots that I won't be able to videotape. But someone told me they are going to suck this year so I am just going to cry and eat shit. (It's now November 26th and I think WVU basketball is 3-0)

5.) Went to Fawcett stadium for a West Liberty game against Walsh University where we lost but I got to see God juice an orange on the Pro Football Hall of Fame. It was such an intense out of body experience and it made shit in the doorless crapper for hours while pissing on the high tech wall-o-pee with these sluts.

6.) I started a dorm toilet cleaning business to make some extra cash to go go along with my checks from the state. It costs $100 per toilet and I throw in a free butt massage from my main man Bman. The budget doesn't allow room for real toilet cleaning products so I use Pantene Pro-V that my mom bought me for school. Business has been slow; so far I've only had three customers: One dude who irons his jeans with a midget ironing board in his midget-roofed house, another guy who pissed himself hardcore because his shitter was too gross to stand by, and the last dude started shitting on his chest because his toilet had tons of shit clumps molded to the bowl. Bman let him borrow his shirt after the butt massage but we won't go there, those pics are in the ToddMorrison.com Uncensored section.

7.) West Liberty's Student Government Association has a Myspace!!! OMG!!! I've spent most of the time I could have spent posting being on their myspace page!!!!!!!!!!

8.) I found an Xbox in my cereal box. I strapped that sucker to my wrist with tape and have been playing it like mad all day all night. I wear it everywhere and the ladies love it!!!

9.) There's been like 1,000,000 parties at West Liberty... especially on a Friday!!! Look, there's nowhere to park!!!!

10.) Eating mac n' cheese with a hint buttjuice is also a reason why I haven't posted in so long. Puking on my shoes, also a good reason to not post. I am starting production of a special drink since buttcorn is probably going to be taken off the shelves soon. Roy's Cum Shot. Look for it soon.

11.) I think my mouse driver/software is an avid marijuana smoker. I found some proof. A high mouse is a mouse that doesn't help you post on your website.

OK, so it is November 26th - 2:56pm. I am cheating and leaving this in October to keep my repuation up of one post a month. That means I need to post before December 1st. Can I do it?

If I don't, then you can just click on these pictures I don't feel like making stories for:

See anything besides my double chin action? - How about now? - Beer box fighting - More beer box fighting - Rebel Dietz - But I'm more of a rebel - Free dose anyone? - Ass kicking aftermath 1 - Ass kicking aftermath 2 - Ass kicking aftermath 3 - Mom bought me new sheets that are a bit flashy - Q's birthday passed out - Q's birthday 2 - Q's birthday 3 - Q can't drive - Snakes and beer - My Spring 2007 schedule - 18 hours - shit - Looks like Todd2 is going to puke on me or something.

Todd: Here is my post.
You: (while fingering your butt for some corn) Dude, this isn't a real post.
Todd: Why not?
You: (while eating a crispy buttcorn dingleberry¹) You don't have any links to pictures...
Todd: Oh, my bad.
You: You also don't have a main picture for your post like you always do.
Todd: I knew I forgot something:

dingleberry¹ - A delinquent partial turd which grasps anal shrubery causing brownish crust to accumulate in ones underwear.

My boy Dietz hit me up on the celly and I said "back" as my ending phone call saying instead of "one". "One" was totally played out before white kids even started saying it. Trust me. Oh yeah, before I backed he invited me to a Steelers game due to me being awesome and him having four tickets with cancelled original plans. Here are a few pictures in addition to the one to the left of your right eye. Beer was expensive but delicious, crack heads who like RAZR phones and have a kid and lose their phone are interesting to chat with while he buys your boy a beer, Dietz is the man, game was fun but preseason, Steeler's won, forget who they played, had a good time.

In summary, universal literary canon could reconcile Shakespeare's concepts, so literary canon wanted to express universal, in-depth symbols. One man did party tricks around police like a mofo.

Quick, what is in the glass? It starts with a P. No, not pee but that does rhyme with tea, silly Billy with a little willy.

My place of employment let me come back again for the summer because I love them and they love me. To make it quick, I mostly (only 2 times) took pictures of myself by beer and (4 or 5 times) delivered baked goods to other stores. The van is pretty big and I would have to load it full and have 22 blind spots while driving. But being a natural born hustla it was no problem for me... only hit shit with it once. Speaking of work, I work with this kid and didn't want to put him on the website but he uses the same method as me for protection... on his car. Oh man I am so good you all think my weiner is big and want me!! YES! w00t!

Shit, feels like something is going wron g with my websi ii te.@!$#$@^!

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This one time I wanted to take a shower and there was no running water so I made an away message for it and took pictures. But I didn't make one for when I brushed my teeth after the water worked again. I wish I would have, the whole post is ruined without it...

Here's my school bill shit with no free financial aid this year due to mother getting remarried last year. I qualified for a loan, work for sports information at school, and wrote a fat check for the 2nd time since I have posessed a checking account. I am not trying to take out private loans. I worked all summer for two grand and now I have $300 left. But during summer I got a variety of hot pocket selections so that makes up for no finacial aid. My mom said she'd pay for my books, so it's all worked out until next semester. Speaking of family, I felt a little extra trashy one day when I saw this note up close on my front door. As far as I know stepdad is still a coal miner just got laid off for a week? Doesn't matter to me until this summer when I will be craving a delicious frozen most of its life and microwaved hot pocket.

I bought these headphones because the chick likes vibration and I thought there was a secret penis insertion hole in the left earpiece and the usb jack is way too big. I was wrong but my dog likes the vibration. Oh wait, I forgot to mention. Sugar, my dog was put to sleep for $30, and and extra $30 was paid for them to throw her away. This happened less than a month ago. I got to say goodbye and pet her fat ass one last time. She didn't move much. I am sure she is happier at the dump than walking sideways and eating crunchy poopnugs.

The boner of the month would have to go to marijuana plants being grown in my neighborhood in the woods. No one ever specified where the plants were exactly but local neighbors and I think it was close to the landfill by the sewage green pools...

Sewage green pools at a dump in North Park you ask yourself? WTF is that you also just asked yourself. I then answer with a video that shows you exactly what I am talking about. [VIEW THE VIDEO - 4.85MB]. After the video you will get the urge to see real pictures and I have those for you, too, for no reason whatsoever. Three weeks before the marijuana plant findings, two of my buddies and myself went down with a few drinks because we missed the aroma of natural gas and trash... and I needed pictures for content for this dank ass website you can't get enough of because I don't feed your poopybutt with enough RBC. Path 1 - Path 2 - Pool 1 - Pool 2 - Pool 3 - Pool 4 - Froggy Fred - should be dead. I don't know if this is sewage or just grass mixed with ass; but I know thousands of tadpoles and frogs live in it. [THROWING ROCKS NOT COCKS - 812KB]

North Park Trash n' Bash 2006: We were going to make it a weekly thing but due to neither of us having our own car it only made it for one week. Here's how it works:

- You need a driver and a runner. Sometimes the runner is referred to as a "dicker picker" if female. For this instance we will just call her a runner/gunner/funner than not picking trash and eating poop.
- The next thing you need to do is obvious: You search boxes, trash cans, giant turbo greeners, and load up the trunk with everything you don't need.
- Remember it's all about fun and not making the trash men/women throw as much shit into the truck in the morning. It's better in your room, or shit, you can even leave it in your car. You never know when you might need a completely useless hose, TV, or lamp while on the road. It also makes for cool pictures if you have a website.
- And last, ofcourse, is getting wasted at the local playground to celebrate.

Saw a beer pong table full of boys, found a nice butt in the crowd, beer pong turned for the worse. I stopped taking pictures when one fight multiplied into five - was scared I was going to get jacked in the face from behind for having a white camera that resembles a ping pong ball. Ping pong isn't for kids and 2% milk anymore.

Officials hope the park will rival that of Kennywood Park, which began business in 1898 as a trolley park in West Mifflin, Pa., and evolved into the Pittsburgh-area's leading amusement park.

I have a huge post lined up but it's the last day of the month and I have to work at 4PM today so your getting this instead.

I didn't believe it when I heard about this theme park coming close to the area. Then I see it on the news and hear all this shit. The night I saw it on the news I wanted to see the blue prints for it and stuff and looked for a website. I found this one. The website is horribly designed and all the plans/things to be made are drawn in a cartoony format.

I decided to investigate the website and see who its owners were. If you go here you can do a search of the domain. The domain is registered by Domains by Proxy, Inc. Here's what the main page of DomainsByProxy.com says:

But now there's a solution: Domains By Proxy!

The registration contact is also private...

Why would a theme park creator need to hide their information let alone have an ugly website?

- Kennywood has a nice website and doesn't hide information.
- Six Flags has a nice website and doesn't hide information.
- Cedar Point has a nice website and doesn't hide information.

When you search Wild Escape in google another one pops up that was supposed to be made in Nebraska in 2002. It was never made. But the website is up for it. Lets look them up. Same thing, private.

The websites are identical in text they just change the names and a few images. See WV Wild Escape and Nebraska Wild Escape main pages.

Even the cartoon layout of the park is the same with some color adjustments and a few windows. WV one on TV and the Nebraska one from the website.

I found an article from WTOV9 about the same stuff I discovered. Read it here.

One last thing, why would this guy need to create multiple limited liability companies? For that matter, ones you search for and they don't have websites. EVERYONE HAS A WEBSITE FOR EVERYTHING. For the one in Nebraska, it is Papa's Park, LLC and for West Virginia it is Endeavour, LLC. In the above news article I copied and pasted from local newspaper website, it said Crystal Mountain LLC was producing the park. Let us google search that together now... Maybe I don't know anything about limited liability companies but why have so many? I learned about them in accounting but remember nothing (Mr. Michael Todd Blackwell is the coolest man in the world, by the way). Wouldn't one with all people under it and have a nice website do justice? Not if you scam investors.

So I am no longer going to get my hopes up for this place. I have more belief in me hearing on the news that the plan fell through and $200 million was taken from the investors because they signed a paper that had a cartoon drawing on it and sounded like big profits. I realize this still might actually be created and I am basing it off of website content and domain information, but it sounds all too shady to me. If this thing actually happens you can bet I drive that ten minute distance and get naked and play in the water park with these girls I had a sevensome with them when I didn't go to the beach this summer.

This guy better take his scam overseas in 2009 and hope they don't have internet or don't care to waste a lot of investor millions.

What do you guys think about this?

Another post coming in a few days.

The lcd screen on my most recent camera that was around $120 broke. I bought a cheaper one that time knowing it was going to break because I suck and can't afford $300 ones weekly. I just bought a refurbished Olympus from eBay for $150, I think. I keep forgetting to put it in my pocket because my last camera has been broke since summer started. I am telling you this because this post is lacking personal pictures due to forgetting my camera or spending too much of my time searching the internet for my mangirl.

Everyone has been watching the World Cup and talking about Ronaldo and Ronaldinho and everyone else I don't feel like looking up their names for the correct spelling. While I am home for the summer I have basic cable, not extended basic like everyone else gets who doesn't already have digital cable/satellite. That means I get channels 2 - 25. I magically get channels 43 - 56 and some other odd ending channels. ESPN is in the 30's so I am not fortunate enough to get to watch any of the games. NO ESPN!? You ask. Yeah no ESPN, and a gay dad; no wonder why I know nothing about the 1989 World Series or who Dan Marino's first interception went to. I think sometimes games are on ABC but I don't care, slut. So to compensate and feel like I fit in, I go online and look at pictures of girls in team apparel.

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Here's my Spring 2006 grades. Best semester I have had yet. Still no 3.0.

For about 3 days there was a little puppy taking baby shits everywhere in the basement and on my face when I was in the mood. My step sister brought it home and then had me take it out and play with it in the early day while she was working or doing whatever it is she does. The cage was pretty small for a small dog and it just barked when I put it away. But once my mom found out she said no get rid of it and that's the end of that useless story. I guess the one fat dog we have that lives nextdoor at my grandparents is enough (Sugar is my dog and there are pictures of her towards the bottom right column and one of me when she was skinny and I was cool on the phone talking to my bitches).

Two posts ago I talked about my buddy Mike McNeil and his poker playing. He bought a watch off my mom, she loves him, and he is now apart of the fridge family. Welcome, Mike. Good thing you don't play poker with Bob, he only plays when you let him add in his 53rd card. My mom would be so sad...

My small room has been a mess since I came home from college. I blame woot.com and their shipping boxes that don't dizzolve into air after you open them, and the internet for my lack of caring to clean it up.

So lets get to the pictures from the one you see to the left of this post. About two weeks before scheduled, my boy Bill J kept talking about a birthday party for one of the guys in the meat department at work. Bill and I go way back to the days of hanging out at Hardee's late on the weekends. He also gives great pointers on how to please a lady. [WATCH THE VIDEO - 1.08MB]

I decided I'd go once Ronica agreed to pick me up, pregame with me, then head out once Seth got home from work. I was wasted before we entered and it only went down hill from there. I had my new camera but was unable to think about getting it out for I was dancing with older women and spilling beer down their backs just as Bill J taught me. Here's the rest of the pictures Bill took with his 1989 film camera that I scanned:

Bill + his girls gone wild shirt = A PIMP - Bill and I dancing, waiting for the 40 year olds - Floor freestyling - You, come here and poop in this can

Went fishing with Turtle, B, and Bob. For some reason I decided to be legal and bought a print it out yourself fishing license online for $25. Dump was going to come but he had toothpicks to jam in his teeth and anal canal. B caught a nice one but mine was huge.

Name: rod anthon
Email Address: u_hit_*nospam*me@yahoo.com
Comments:

Hi todd i'm a great fan of yours, i read your site regularly. I also came to know that u are the member of Nitrovideo...so if u don't mind can u share the user ID and password? Do it if its only cool with you..otherwise its ok..

Thanx..mail it my id u_*nospam*hit_me@yahoo.com

---

The past few years my birthdays just have not been like I wished they were. Somestimes a complete let down, other times just a wtf? who cares it is only a day I was born go back to work I want to sleep all day. Last year I completely forgot it was my birthday until later that night when it hit me while driving with a friend. But not this year, this year I had Facebook on my side. No longer do I have to sign onto AOL Instant Messenger and put "Today is my birthday" and see how many people wish me a happy one. Thanks to Facebooks awesome email announcements as soon as I dialed up to my grandfather's internet account I was delighted with fulfilling emails saying people have written on my wall.

I do believe this is my first birthday while being an addicted nothing-else-to-do facebooker for life. I have seen other people go through birthdays on facebook, but nothing is more totally-insta-awesome like seeing my wall posts jump from 30 some to a whopping 59. I can never be that cool again until next year. THANK YOU FACEBOOK!!!

For my birthday I also added google ads. I am not allowed to tell you to click them for that will make me a few cents, and I also cannot tell you to click that Download Google Pack thing because I get $2 if you do dowload it for the first time. The ads are mostly about toilets because I told them I poop 23 times a day and they agreed to let me advertise with them because pooping is cool or something. I don't do it because it is cool, I do it because I love the rush. When it comes down to it, I just think they just like my recycled butt corn.

And oh yeah, if you don't remember this then read it.

Finally a word on what was up:

Date: Tuesday, May 16, 2006 12:24 PM
Name: Glynis
Email Address: gl***s_****rd@hotmail.com
URL:
Comments:

Yeah, that story was kind of a flop, if you know what I mean. I don't think it ever really got off the shelf. I'm the mean boom-op for PBS who was drug to the infamous Grant Ave. against my will and my better judgment. You were, however, a great subject. :) Shooting Morantown at night, though, is tricky and our camera equipment wasn't up to par--even if it did look fancy. Good luck with your campaign.

First, you sluts owe me about $300 to cover the ticket charge and AA meetings I had to go to. I remember I had to close my savings account to pay for that underage ticket shit. Then I had to fold up envelopes and sweep the streets of Morgantown for hours. All of this for you and your video that never came out of the damn camera. That girl in the picture probably ate it she was scary and you are scared of her because she bit your leg once. Second, I remember saying First, send me a copy of that shit so I can not feel so used; I wore a penis suite to a football game once and no one even has the video from that. I can't live life this way, man. Third, if I pointed the arrow to the right person(you), then you look like the nice man massaging my anal tubulator not the scary boom mic man. Or that might have been the scary girl I just got a crush on 24 seconds ago. She is def checking me out there. I got her number later that night. Anyway I hate you, but love you for the follow up comment; my life has been standing still watching PBS waiting for my one moment of glory. I can now piss on fresh laundry again with ease. Thank you, Glynis.

The Man of the Year award has to go out to my boy Mike McNeil. This isn't official but I do believe since December 2005 he has made over $300,000 just in online poker. He just got back from an all expense paid trip to Vegas he won from Ultimate Bet. It was a $25,000 buy in World Series of Poker Tournament. He placed 30 something out of 600 or so and won $70,000 some. Pretty damn tight.

So what does Mike do with all this fun money he has been making? Lets start off by buying 4 tickets to the 1st and 2nd rounds of the NCAA Division I basketball tournament in Auburn Hills, Michigan to watch your Mountaineers beat some ass. I got a video from one of the games. [WATCH IT - 1.17MB]. The Palace of Auburn Hills is awesome. I have never been to an NBA game or even stepped foot in a stadium. I have also never eaten dinner at 7PM in a hotel while waiting on reservations at Benihana at 9PM. Yeah, we all got delicious steak dinners at 7PM except for Mike, he got a salad. 9PM comes around and we get into the Embassy bus with a crackhead driver who has no idea what is going on or where Benihana is. We arrive with full stomachs and order more filet mignon and watch it be prepared in front of us.

When there were no games going on we'd chill in the nice Embassy hotel and relax, sometimes fighting, eating microwave pizza, fighting more, drinking wine, fighting some more, and some more.

For the record, Michigan sucks for 3 reasons: Michi